Sunday, July 27, 2008

Twin

Well, the books probably have gotten to my head. I'm getting a little restless already.
Maybe i'm the kind who gets envious of others easily. Others better than me.
More successful. Better. Or so it seems.
Why couldn't i be like them? Haven't i worked enough? Haven't i? Or am i just destined to be the inferior.

What's up with me today? Not that i've been nonchalent about me being the less. Not that i haven't already realised?
Talk about living-satisfied. Looks like i'm just too human. Competitive. Greedy. Hungry. Hungry.

Always this insatiable hunger. Lust for the more.
Disgusting aint it? Dirty and ugly and condemned.
Abhorred by the good but celebrated by the Nations.

Who doesn't want to be better? To be honest i started writing this after reading about the close friendship that this particular group of boys shared. Well, it wasn't exactly about their brethen bonds but i interpreted it. It was a co-owned blog by the 4 boys.

Didn't i share such brotherhood to? Did i? Had i not belong to such a clique? I could take comfort that i belong to the family of Christ, but i must admit i yearn for brotherly companionship. Someone whom i know is my best friend...

Because i don't have one.... Not anymore, since probably the year before. Who would hear? Who would know? Its just me right? Am i. Unworthy of even this.

Why brother then? What about female counterparts? I beseech myself to avoid whipping of tongues i guess.

Maybe i'm just feeling lonely. Maybe i just wanted to be lonely.

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