defeat?

haiz. okae fine... though i managed to get through the heats to the semi finals.
well, i knew i wouldnt be able to stand against the insane speed of the obviously better.
i went on anyway to give my best shot. despite the odds, i was all out to give my best shot. i prayed really hard. i really needed Him to guide me, to console and be with me. probably because i thought maybe He'll perform a miracle? aha.
right. i lost anyway.
no matter, i didnt perform well today. although even if i did i had probably still lost. however, during the heats we broke our personal best, and it was rather good i would say. but the competition was very tough. i just wasnt good enough.

okok i must start organising my thoughts. there are so many things i wanted to say about this competition. i learnt so much. more than ive lost.

firstly, i just want to Glorify my God. that i know, without Him i would have never been able to reach thus far. that i never would have been able to do it on my own.
and so what the defeat! ive gain so much more. ive learn how to trust in Him, how to keep returning into His arms and most of all, realise how much i really needed Him.
i would never be able to do it without you Lord. in fact i cannot live without you.

ok i just got distracted watching this rather interesting story on the television. it was first about this boy whom is too lazy to study and frequently fails his test. but because of the promise he made to his deceased father he studied really hard and score extremely well for his latest test. however.. he's freakingly insensitive and overassuming teacher accused him of cheating and not believing that he did it himself. irritating.. hahas.

ok digressed.

where was i... hmmm
okae most of the other stuffs i learnt aint that important so i wouldnt be bothered to pen it down.
i was awfully impressed by MJC this year. i saw how they drastically improved from their last year's standards. i applaud them really. im touched by their determination to break free from a "mediocre"(winks at audrey/collin/jiajun) school to a deservely much-feared school today.

most of all, thank God for jianrui. im proud of you. again, to God be all the glory youve brought to him. ive seen how hard you pushed yourself to have finally gotten to where you are. and that you have too maintained your faith as you fight on, with God in your heart. Fear not, for He who has created heaven and earth, is stronger than all those opponents you face out there. even those so-called super zhai rowers.=) believe!
and im glad that youre going to be baptized too. finally you are going to take this first step of obedience! ahhaa.

thank God for jianrui. you really made this competition so..so spritual for me. and most probably for you too. ahahas i still remember how both of us were so discouraged and nervous that we embraced each other so tightly and reminding each other of God with us. praise is to be His. i felt really comforted jianrui... although we were in full view of everyone there (it might have looked quite gay?)... thank you again.

well, none of us in nanyang made it to the finals but we'll still be down tmr. to watch, continue learning, and to support (jianrui,mervyn?).lol.
i'll be back. i'll be back. stronger, better, faster. in rowing, in God.

To Lord be ALL the Glory.